Three Things

March 20, 2013

week 7 challenge: a black and white photo // write about your insecurities

          As people, we all have our insecurities. So far, I've been learning to accept and live with them--even think of them as blessings in disguise. I have always wondered, why do we need to make a big deal out of everything that relates to our wants and satisfactions? Maybe it's our human nature. Maybe I just don't know.

          Recently I do not have a lot of insecurities. I used to be really insecure about the way I dress, mostly because of the people in school and around me. I'm not the type to wear dresses and fancy tops often, most of the time you would see me in a t-shirt and shorts. I grew up in a simple family, we barely go out on "shopping sprees" and when we do, we at most get two things we don't really need. I think that's the right way of living, not splurging money on designer clothing and worrying about what to wear when going out. For me, it wastes time and resources and you would only do that if you're the type of person that is vain (no offense, guys).

          Secondly, it would be performing in front of an audience. The stage-fright and shyness I have is bothering me, especially since I'm in high school now. It's really hard for me to recite in class, ask a question, talk to someone I don't know, and merely playing the guitar for our class concert. My voice always lowers to the point that I have to shout, I shake inside a lot even after it's over, I make mistakes and mess up all the time, but I guess it's one of those fears that stay with you forever. It is part of who I am and sometimes I wish I was more confident, but I learned to live with it. I also learned that class concerts are really fun.

          Lastly, it would be this blog. Not going to lie, I was pretty insecure about sharing a whole bunch of my life to the world. I get worried whenever someone I know (friends, family, classmates) would find out about this, and I always brace myself to what comments they would tell me. It is a bit ironic of me to think it is better off for people I know personally to not read my blog, because I had to make it public for a reason.

          Aside from those three, I could not be a more happy, content, secure, confident person. I also would like to re-introduce myself. I am Jianine. I am awfully shy, and was insecure about the way I looked and dressed, and the fact that I have a blog. I like cats and oranges, and I am the same exact person you've been seeing ever since the start of this blog. Hi there, thanks for taking your time to read all of this.

Have a wonderful week everybody :)
p.s. summer, come at me.

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  1. It's a great feeling to say you're no longer insecure about something. Good for you.
    I used to be so insecure about the way I dressed, but lately I've been finding my own style, and it makes me feel confident.
    Lovely blog by the way.

  2. This was beautiful, Jianine. I love everything you've said here.